Monday, April 27, 2009

The Sermon in a Song

Casting Crowns: Slow Fade
Casting Crowns: The Voice of Truth

It's a slow fade.... when black and white have turned to gray.

Thoughts invade... choices made... a price will be paid when you give yourself away.
People never crumble in a day..... it's a slow fade.

I almost faded completely.

The Black and White had turned gray.

What I knew to be wrong turned into "okay with in reason".

I became ashamed of the Holy Spirit.

Ashamed of the Holy Spirit!

The same Holy Spirit that spoke to me clearly so many times, prompting me to pray for people I didn't even know.

The Holy Spirit that literally put me on my face weeping for Africa; weeping for the Congo.... and I couldn't understand WHY!!!!! And then blowing me away the very next morning at church when a man from South Africa spoke briefly, and asked our congregation to pray for him as he prepares to leave for The Congo.

The Holy Spirit that grabbed my heart, and broke it because He gave me a glimpse of the dying spirit in my friend.... The Holy Spirit that said "Pray for him, Amber. Weep for him, and intercede on his behalf, because his spirit is too weak to do it." And no matter how hard I tried to avoid it, my chest would literally hurt and my body sobbed uncontrollably, because God was breaking my heart for this person. This was the Holy Spirit I became ashamed of......

And there was no reason to be ashamed. It was a matter of fading so far away from The Word, and becoming wrapped up in "what the world" was doing, and what people thought of me, that I just kept quiet about the Truth I had already been exposed to.

A long time ago I invited God to come in and take over my life. And in 1999 I pleaded that He would NEVER let me leave. I surrendered my will, and I meant it. "My life is YOURS God. I give it to you, and I never want to be apart from You. I never want to live a stale Christian life. I want ALL of You." And though I've wandered so far, and got caught up in The Slow Fade, Jesus snatched me up into His arms and said "Daughter. You are mine!"
I was lukewarm and God was making it clear to me that He hated it. I kept hearing in my head, over and over.... "are you going to be Hot or Cold? Hot or Cold, Amber. Hot or Cold. Lukewarm is not an option."
But going from lukewarm to hot isn't easy.

Oh what I would do to have, the kind of faith it takes to climb out of this boat I'm in, onto the crashing waves.

To step out of my comfort zone, into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is, and He's holding out His hand.

But the waves are calling out my name and they laugh at me, reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed... The waves they keep on telling me... time and time again BOY, you'll never win. you'll never win.

The Voice of Truth tells me a different story. The Voice of Truth says "Do not be afraid". The Voice of Truth says "This" is for my glory.

Out of all the voices calling out to me; I will choose to listen and believe The Voice of Truth.

I am choosing to listen to The Voice of Truth. Because everything else is pointless.... a chasing of the wind.... Jesus is the only voice that matters!

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