Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Double Standards

As a follow up to my previous blog - Necessary Evils - I wanted to add on to the process of weight loss, food addiction recovery, and general wellness.

For exactly one year, I pondered, prayed about, and researched the weight loss drug Phentermine. It is currently used by most doctors and weight loss clinics as an appetite suppresent. A year ago I talked to my doctor about weight loss, and his first instinct was to perscribe this medication. I declined. My fear was based on the "amphetamine" label that this drug carried, and I did not want to trade a food addiction for a drug addiction.

After a full year of effort to lose weight by diet and excercise, I decided to revisit Phentermine as an option. Here are my reasons.

A. Staying away from food proved to be the ultimate hardship. I wanted to eat healthy and control my portions, but never seemed to stay consistent. I felt defeated in my efforts. I knew how to eat and what to eat to make my body healthy, but I didn't control myself

B. 3 kids (one who is being homeschooled) and a sporatic schedule disabled me from keeping a work out routine at my gym, and I never seemed to get the motivation to work out at home consistently.

C. My energy levels have decreased significantly in the past few months, and working out proved to put me in an even deeper exhaustion, which should not be the case. Working out has been proven to actually increase energy and mood!

D. I entered a pattern of binging and couldn't seem to get out of that pattern, putting on (and keeping on) over 5 pounds in a 3 week period.

After speaking to a doctor at a local weight loss clinic, and having blood work that proved that I was in perfect health, I decided to go ahead and try losing weight via an appetite suppresent. This is where my double standard comes into play. It's like the "diet arsenic"... I know it's not a good choice, and I know it's absolutely bad to put these chemicals in my body, but I feel like it's the best option for now.

My plan is to stay on this program for a full 30 days, using my decreased appetite to train myself to eat healthy. No. Not healthy as in "low fat, diet foods". The healthy manner in which I spoke of in my previous blog. No red meat, no dairy, no caffeine. Whole foods that nourish me and help me to stay recovered from food addiction.

This means that it won't be an option for me to have "just one" cookie, or piece of cake. I won't be able to "cheat' here and there socially when pizza is on the menu, and I certainly will not be able to give into the carbonated cravings I have. It will have to be a lifestyle that I make permanent. Just like the alcoholic that can no longer drink.... it will have to be forever.

The best way to make it a forever change, is to form these habits now.

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