Friday, October 8, 2010

Nostalgia.... Punk'd out Rock n' a lil' bit a R&B

I have a tendency to grab up a "SO WHAT" attitude.

"Whatever.  I don't care. (Suck IT!)"

(What??  I'm just saying...)

P!nk can ROCK her "so what" song in my ear buds while I'm sweating my flubber off at the gym, and the music motivates me to work a little harder.
Song ends. I feel great. Next in queue.... "Stupid Girls".
Ohhhh Yeee-UH!    I turn up the speed a few notches and kick it a bit harder.
 I.  Love. This.  Song.
(and really miss working out!)

Miss Alecia is obviously taunting the Paris Hilton's and Jessica Simpson's  of the world...

'Cause for REAL- what is up with this 'show off the junk in your trunk, your lady lumps and materialize your lifestyle' attitude that chicks take so seriously.  What do you get out of it?  Horn-dog men drooling over you?  Surfacey friendships and relationships?  I mean? Who wouldn't want that, right?!  (Ummm.  NO)

Pink isn't necessarily the role model I wanna expose my girls to.  I don't wanna jam out to Stupid Girls in my mini van, if ya know what I'm sayin'?


She brings a good point to a few of the songs she writes.
She's a great artist.

Back in the day... way back when.... When I was 'straight up in the WORLD',  and I was gettin' my CLUB on way more than I should have been;  I had an 'attitude' about me that was certainly not instilled by my peers (or, my parents). 

This is hilarious.  I hesitate to admit it, even.  But- hey- it's part of this nostalgic list that I can't avoid, so I'm putting it out there.

TLC ($5 to the person that can breakdown the abbreviation without Google...) put out this song that DEFINED (embarrassingly, but thankfully) my 'I don't play' attitude.


I'll wait while you finish your snickering.....

Seriously.  In case you have NO IDEA what this song is- I'll break down the important parts.

"A scrub is a guy that thinks he's fly..... also knows as a BUSTA... always talking bout what he wants... but sits on his broke _$$"

"No.. I don't want yo number, NO.. I don't wanna give you mine.... and NO.... I don't wanna meet you nowhere... NO.. don't want none of yo time."

If you could see me now- you're staring at my red cheeks and "SHUT UP, stop laughing" face.
Gah.  I was 16 and 17, OK!?!  Leave me alone.....

So, this was one of the songs that (somehow) aided me in avoiding the "hoochie-mama" status.  I didn't waste my time trying to please anybody; much less some horny young guy that had nothing more on his mind than "gettin' some bootie" in his efforts of pursuing me.

Of course, being that I was hormonally geared- as most teenagers are.... yup..... part of me wanted to just go along with whatever I "felt" like doing.

 Most of me, however,  knew that it wasn't worth the high price that 'free love' had to offer.  This is where my "I'll do what I WANT to do" stubbornness met up with my "do what you SHOULD do" attitude, and saved me a lot of grief.  Nobody was gonna pressure me, or persuade me to do anything- not even my hormones! 

Technically, I wasn't s'pose to be clubbin at 16 and 17.  
Obviously- we didn't mess around with technicalities, did we? 
(what teenager does?)

It was fun.  Can't deny it.  Dressing up, having dudes buy us drinks, dancing to the 90's, walking around Athens at 2 AM....  meeting the locals, and befriending them- thus giving us a 'hangout-sober-up' place before we had to drive through Arcade to get back to our podunk home-town.

That was a bit dangerous for us- 
I have to stop there and touch on that.  
We were smart, but... really... 
It's Athens.  IT's where the 'freaks' live.
  Not a good idea.  

While I was playing video games with a guy at this dude's Athens loft,  so  me and my girlfriend could sober up;  my girlfriend was... um... NOT playing video games with the other dude, in the other room.  I need not elaborate.
My club-buddy knew he wasn't gettin' any- so we chilled out on his couch, and played B-Ball via his Nintendo for several hours....
I'd  press pause to excuse myself and go BARFup the sex-on-the-beach cocktails I had too many of... come back to the NBA graphics, chat about college ambitions, and parental annoyances.... etc.
We ended up snoozing on opposite sides of the couch til morning. No big deal.

Times like these... aside for my desperate need of a toothbrush..... there were no regrets on my part.  Donning nothing more than a headache on my conscience worked out well for me when morning came.
 My girlfriend, on the other hand,  got "hushed" when her 'man' got a call from his girlfriend early the next morning.... and the drive back home proved to be a sad one.

Good. (not so) Clean. Fun.

Other times, dancing in the dim-lit room of an old Athens building, listening to Christina Aguilera sing about "rubbing her the right way" cause she was a Jeanie in a Bottle....while  scantily dressed, and more than a little bit buzzed- dudes getting a little grabby didn't bug me so much.  I had my limits, but they got a bit thwarted when the liquor worked it's magic.   I didn't mind 'playing' the game, but when it got serious- I sobered up REAL fast.

(Remember kids.... inhibitions can quickly get lost when alcohol comes into the picture)

I sure wasn't innocent, though.  Sometimes I think the mistakes I made in those short few years may have trumped  the 'casual sex' no-not-gonna-happen' stance I took.  

It shows how devious the Enemy is.  He knew how to "get me".  Casualness wasn't it.  He threw out an entirely different deck when he realized that.
Stupid, naive me... I sho' didn't put my guard up against 'relationship'.  TLC wasn't putting out any songs about how to NOT get sucked into a humiliating, life-changing relationship.... or TWO.

And thankfully.... NONE of those mistakes are on my nostalgic list.
I've moved on.  Forgiven, and been FORgivin'.....
The goodness of being able to 'look back' on STUPIDITY, learn from it, and move ON.

The mistakes we make- can, if we let them, be GREAT life lessons.  I have an understanding on the importance of fidelity.  I can see past the enemy's attempt at placing 'provoking' thoughts in my head where my marriage vows would take a hit.

Many of us women get tempted to let our minds wander.  At the times in our lives when being married totally SUCKS, there's nothing like a smooth-talking guy to challenge our moral compass.

It's times like these that I can look back at my past mistakes, and take note of the deep EMPTINESS that an immoral relationship can bring.  As often as I've even-a-little-tiny-bit entertained the idea of challenging the boundaries I've set in my marriage, it's more often that I'm reminded of how, really, nobody compares to the perfection that God created when He ordained the holy-matrimony I'm apart of.

 (So thankful for the admission of close girl friends on this subject, 
so that I don't feel alone in the fact that minds do... have a tendency... to wander)

Sometimes we want to FORGET the screw-ups we were apart of in our past.  I'm glad I haven't forgotten.  I never want to forget.  I want to stay on guard.  I want to remember everything.  Not dwell on- not regret- but remember.  

History plays an enormous part in ALL of our future.  

No comments:

Post a Comment