If this is what it takes to get my attention back to You- You have it. I'm paying attention now.
Like a parent disciplining their child in an effort to instruct them in The Way that they should go; that is what You are doing in me.
James instructed us to count it a JOY to encounter these struggles. And I am. I wouldn't have chosen them; these struggles. And I first, I was so angry. "Why would you let this happen!??!" Having children has allowed me to get a better comprehension of who You are, as my Father. When I tell my daughter "I am not choosing to punish you. You have chosen to disobey, which has led to your punishment", I have an understanding that You are saying the same thing to me....
I should have never taken my eyes off of You. I should have chosen obedience.
You gave me sweet, tender reminders to come back.
So gently You called my name. But I dismissed You. I put You aside.
I convinced myself that I would come back to You later.....
and still You pursued me, though I ignored You.
I ignored Your insistence that I set aside a time to be with You. I chose me.
I ignored Your reminders to open my Word. I chose other things.
I ignored You time and time again.....
And I drifted further and further from You.
Thank You for telling me that I'm Worthy. Thank You for loving me enough to discipline me. Thank You for pursuing me.
8 months ago