If I Didn't Already Know

If I didn't already know Jesus,
 truly know Him......
It would be hard for me to understand that He is the "Real Deal".

If I had to depend on a 'church' to teach me
"Who that Guy  is that died for me.... because He loved me......" in this season of Christianity.....
I'd scoff and sneer and call those people crazy for believing such nonsense.

If I didn't already know that people- you and me- were total idiots
 and can't be depended on to walk a narrow enough path to truly represent Jesus....
 I would never have bothered trying to stumble back to the narrow
after wandering so far off into the wide (over and over and over again).

Churches today- in this day and time- seem to be complete JOKES.
  "Whoo hoo we're gonna clap our hands and stomp our feet, and slap a smile on our fake-little-faces."  And all the while- the truth of the matter is- from my experience as a decade-long church goer (and Jesus-Lover) NOBODY gives a FLIP about ANYBODY.    And you and I are both in that category- whether we wanna admit it or NOT.

I don't make sacrifices in an effort to reach out to the hurting-
'cause I'm hurting- and I gotta try to figure out my own garbage
before I can help my neighbor take out his.
(That's where Satan gets us, though.  He keeps us so wrapped up in our own chaos, that we are too ashamed to reach out, be open, and get real with each other.)

Most of the time- I don't even know if somebody IS hurting-
because people are so plastic.
It's like church-goers have been required to inject botox into their life;
It all looks smooth and nice, and pretty.... but underneath
 it's disgusting, diseased and deadly!
God forbid anyone know it, too.
Oh no!!  Church-folk can't have people actually KNOWING they got issues of the botulism-kind.

Maybe I'm jaded.  Maybe I have simply had enough of arrogant men (and women) posting themselves onto self-righteous pedastools, wagging their crooked fingers at the world- knowing their just as bad (or worse) as the lifestyle they are judging.

These 'pastor's and 'church-folk', who lack humility, convincing themselves that they are righteous....
 Boo on them!  Boo on all of us "Christians".
 I'd hate to see Jesus' face in this moment.  I'd die of shame.  I would want to hide under a rock if He called me to heaven in this moment.  I'm not righteous.  I'm not holy.  I'm nothing.  He loves me anyway, though?  Oddly- surprisingly- I know for sure that He does!

If I didn't already know it..... It would be really hard to convince me that Jesus is awesome.
And HE knew we weren't gonna be {awesome}.
And THAT is why He gave His life for us.  {Because we're NOT awesome)

And I'm sick and STINKIN tired of people acting like they are AWESOME.
 F.Y.I.  "You're NOT!"
And neither is your 'church'  or your 'pastor' or your 'Christian-friends'.

And neither am I.
Especially not me.